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| Life 102
Table of ContentsChapter 1 - Grand Theft Autumn
Chapter 2 - Swing, Swing
Chapter 3 - Why Don't You & I
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Chapter 1
"Someday I'll appreciate in value
Get off my ass and call you"
- "Grand Theft Autumn", Fall Out Boy
An excerpt from Life 102 :
"Every other morning he would get to this class just a few minutes early. Coincidentally, it was the only time he got to a class early. He walked down the steps of the auditorium.
'Third row from the front, left side of the aisle.'
His sole motivation for being awake at what seemed such an ungodly hour was to ensure he got that seat.
He sat down and looked up at the clock on the front wall of the room. "8:47 AM," he thought to himself as he rubbed the sleep from his eye, "perfect timing."
He dug in his backpack for some paper and a pen that way it would at least look like he was paying attention once class had started. Amidst the shuffle of papers and bags of the other few students in the room he could hear the wall clock ticking. Slowly more students began to trickle into the room, filling in the rows. These few minutes of anticipation always seemed to dragged on for so long. Then right as drowziness was beginning to overcome him out of the corner of his eye he saw her.
It was the best part of his day.
She slowly made her way down the stairs, seemingly pausing on each step as if she were cautiously descending a steep slope. As she passed him he could smell faint traces of girly perfume and Herbal Essences shampoo. She stopped just a moment later when she reached her spot.
Second row from the front, right side of the aisle, second seat.
Her purplish-pinkish shirt-blouse-thing that she had on (he never was good with girls' clothing) seemed to accent the imaginary aura that surrounded her. Not that she was a purple or pink hue of any sort, but as if her natural beauty exuded through it. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail with a scrunchie of the same color. She sat down and took out her notebook, neatly categorized with dividers and little colored tabs.
Just then the professor hurriedly walked through a side door, already halfway through a sentence about glucose-this and protein-that. She looked up attentively, eager to hear about the day's boring lecture topic.
He sighed.
It had been the same routine for the past few weeks. Once class had started, he would pass the hour watching her as she wrote down notes, scribbled out diagrams, and occasionally laugh to herself when the professor cracked a corny joke. The minutes melted away and suddenly class would be dismissed. Then she would be gone until the next time they had class, and he would remain unbeknownst to her.
He thought back to three days earlier when he had been talking to his friend.
"What's so special about this girl?" his friend asked.
He sat for a minute asking himself really what was so special about her.
"Don't get me wrong," his friend said, interrupting his thought. "I mean, she is a pretty girl. It's just that every time you like a girl, you turn her into this unobtainable object of admiration. But they're not; they're just regular people."
His friend was right. The girls he ended up falling for were simply just normal girls. Granted that yes, they were pretty or cute, not overtly beautiful or gorgeous or anything. But it was just something about them. With each one he would grow fond of their little quirks, come to adore their little imperfections.
She was no exception.
Like the little wrinkles she would get at the corner of her eyes when she smiled. Or how one dimple was more pronounced than the other. Or the little strand of hair that always seemed to fall in front of her face forcing her to try to blow it out of the way, but always to no avail.
"But the problem is you never do anything about it."
He slowly came back to the present, tuning into the professor's indistinct words of chemical reactions.
He hung his head. His friend was right, again. Each one that he would come to love would inevitably slip away as the last. And it was his fault because he could never do more than daydream.
He shook his head, sitting up in his seat. A veil of determination seemed to fall over him. He looked over to her, and with a small smile he thought,
"No. No, not this time." "
~ j
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Chapter 2
"D'you think that I would cry
on the phone
Do you know what it feels like
being alone"
- "Swing Swing", The All-American Rejects
An excerpt from Life 102 :
"She sat staring at her Biology book.
It was open to the chapter on the circulatory system. On the open page lay a diagram of the human heart, detailing the auricles and ventricles in their full. She glanced at her cell phone next to her text book; she had been 'studying' the same page for twenty minutes.
She looked over at her colleague who was furiously scribbling out equations and numbers for his Statistics homework. He would pause on occasion, lean back a little, and scratch his head. She couldn't suppress a half-smile as he would have this inquisitively pensive expression, which was certainly uncharacteristic of him. Then he would make this look of "Ah-ha" as some realization dawned on him and resume his work.
She looked down at her book again. She was trying to memorize the pathway that blood flows through in the heart, but all she could think about was him.
Or rather, all she could do was worry about him.
This wasn't the first time it had happened. It was actually a somewhat frequent occurence for him to seemingly disappear for two, three days without contacting her, or really anyone else for that matter. Then he would suddenly reappear not saying a word about what he had been doing, as if he had been around the whole time.
But still, she couldn't help worrying about him, though part of her tried to reassure herself that he would, eventually, turn up okay as always.
Freddy must have noticed out of the corner of his eye the big frown that had spread across her face. "Stop worrying about him Mel; he's fine. You know he's okay. Watch, he'll probably call you any minute now," he said without looking up.
"oh..." she said in an almost inaudible voice, a little startled having been so entranced in her thoughts. "Oh!" just now comprehending what Freddy had said, "I know, I know... I'm sure he's fine, probably just busy or something... But it's just- I can't help wondering what if something does happen. I mean, how would we find out that something's happened when he never let's anyone know where he is?"
She lowered her head a little as she sighed. "I just wish he would let us know that he's aliv-", she caught herself to keep from thinking the worst, "-that he's doing O.K."
Her phone rang. Without moving her head she looked at the caller ID, unsure if she even wanted to talk at the moment to whoever was calling. Suddenly she bolted upright and grabbed her phone causing Freddy to look up
"Hey!" she said a little too eagerly. "Hey..." she repeated trying to conceal her excitement. She looked over at Freddy who was now sitting up with his arms crossed giving her a look of "I told you so".
"Hi Mel," responded a subdued voice. "What are you doing?"
"Oh, I'm studying with Freddy. Er, well he's actually homeworking while I'm kind of just been blanking out. I'm trying to learn Bio, but none of it seems to be sinking in," she answered hurriedly, as if rushing to her turn to ask. "Um... what about you?" she asked in a meek voice, almost afraid that she might upset him, or worse, to hear him say something horrible happened.
"Just finishing up some homework too. Probably going to bed soon... I'm pretty tired." Even though she was overjoyed to hear his voice, thrilled to be talking with him after three days of not hearing from him, part of her couldn't help feeling down. There was a trace of sadness in his voice though she could tell he was trying to smile behind the phone.
"Oh..." was all she could get out. She sighed; she wanted so much for him to say something more, anything more, but didn't quite know what she expected him to say.
He must have sensed her frustration because he immediately followed with, "I know you've been pretty busy preparing for your test and I feel bad for interrupting your studying. How 'bout I make it up to you? Would you like to have lunch together tomorrow?"
She smiled.
"I would love to."
"Good deal; I will call you in the morning then. Good luck studying, yeah? Don't stay up too late dear."
"I won't. Good night," she paused, "oh, and Jay...
Thank you."
He smiled.
"Of course. Good night Mel."
After she hung up she sat staring at her book again for a second. Freddy was looking at her. She suddenly closed up her book and started putting things back into her bag.
"Sorry hun, I'm getting no where with this. I think I'll be able to concentrate better in my room."
"Okay," was all he said, watching her leave. She was already three yards away from the table when she turned around, ran back, and gave him a hug.
"Thanks for understanding," she said embracing him. The next minute she was bustling again towards the door.
He smiled. "
~j
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Chapter 3
"Every time I try to talk to you
I get tongue tied, turns out
that everything I say to you
Comes out wrong
and never comes out right"
- "Why Don't You & I", Santana featuring Chad Kroeger
An excerpt from Life 102 :
Another class passed while his mind swam with daydream. He had drowned out the professor's droning of chemical bonds and reactions. Though his body was still adjusting to being awake, he felt a spark inside him, ignited by his newfound ambition. His excitement was the only thing preventing him from completely succumbing to the beckoning call of renewed slumber.
His heavy eyelids shot open, a bit startled from the immediate rustle initiated by the professor's dismissal. It took him a second to collect his senses; another minute to collect his stuff. As he gathered up his belongings his brain began formulating a way to introduce himself to her. Still not fully functional, he could only visualize played-out scenes from teen movies. He stared at her adoringly as she passed by him up the steps.
He sighed.
"Who am I kidding?" he thought. Nothing had really changed. In spite of his desire to actually do something, how could he ever bring himself to approach her? And how would she react? Not how he would hope, no doubt.
Then he saw it.
As if in answer to his prayers, a small object fell from the front pocket of her backpack. Since he was the only person who seemed to notice he hurriedly picked up his make-shift invitation. Upon closer look it turned out to be a small ring, similar to that of a keychain.
He rolled his eyes.
On the ring were mini index cards with words written on both sides. He didn't understand why people made these things; he figured that he could memorize the material in the time it took to make the cards. But not one to be unappreciative of a little help from God, he disregarded his irrelevant thought and followed the rest of the students out.
As he squeezed his way through the crowd towards the door, he realized he had lost sight of her. Once outside he hurriedly looked around for her, having to stand on tiptoe to look over the shoulders of the football players in front of him. He could feel his anxiety welling up again at the thought of not being able to talk to her now. His mind was racing.
What if I missed her? I'm going to have to wait two days before I get the chance again to talk to her. What if she needs her notes before then? What if she asks why I didn't give them to her sooner? What if she gets mad that I held onto them for so long-
He breathed a sigh of relief.
A little ways down the street he spotted her standing at the bus stop waiting for the shuttle.
It was now or never. He drew himself up and in the words of his friend thought to himself, "Go get'em J." He was sure, or maybe just really hopeful, that once they were face to face he would be less nervous.
He was, unfortunately, incorrect.
Any confidence he thought he had was merely fleeting. His heart was beating so hard he was afraid that she would hear him approaching. He was now three feet away from her, trying to find his voice.
He stuttered out, "Um, ex-excuse me."
She didn't hear him. Sighing, he leaned foward and tapped her on the should ever so slightly. He was surprised that she had actually felt it when she turned around. He was a bit disheartened by her puzzled look until he realized he was just looking at her blankly.
He blinked and said, "H-Hi. Um, you're Shay, right?"
"Yeah," was all she responded. What am I'm doing? She doesn't want to talk to me; just give her back her ring and go. As much as he wanted to just give her her notes and leave, as ready as his feet were to turn and run, he stood his ground.
"H-hi, you probably don't know me, but I'm Justin." He unconsciously looked at the ground, trying to avoid her gaze.
"I know who you are," she said smiling. He looked up. He knew he was blushing; he could feel his cheeks and ears growing warm. "Did you just come from Professor Gilbert's class too?" she asked.
"Uh yeah, Yeah."
"That class is so boring. I would probably fall asleep if I didn't sit in the front and take notes," she said conversationally.
"Yeah, I don't even bother trying to stay awake." The words just slipped out his mouth without thinking. She let out a little laugh. Talking about class he suddenly remembered why he was talking to her.
Fumbling in his pocket he pulled out the ring. "Oh, here I found this after class. I think you dropped it..."
She gasped, "Oh no! Oh wow, thank you so much! I probably would've died if I had lost it. Oh thank you so much, really."
"No problem."
All right, you gave it to her. Now go before you say something stupid. He could feel his feet beginning to shuffle, readying to leave. He had done what he wanted to do; there was no reason to stay. Yet he remained rooted to the spot. And then his lips began to move, the words again slipping out before he could catch himself. As if someone were speaking through him, he heard himself say, "Um, I don't usually do this, but would you like to get something to eat sometime?"
"What?"
Uh-oh. His heart resumed its fierce thumping.
"Oh uh, do you wanna have lunch sometime?"
"Oh... Um, I'm not sure..."
Crap. Despite how futile it was, something told him to keep going.
"I meant just somewhere on campus; not going out or anything. Like we could just go to the cafeteria or something..." Man... I should've just left! He knew it was pointless to press any further.
"I probably can't, at least Tuesday and Wednesday. I have lunch meetings. Thursday should be okay though." Damn, I feel like such a tool. Why did I-
"Wait, what?" his voice and thoughts said simultaenously. Did he hear her correctly, or was he just imagining really hard?
"So... you want to have lunch Thursday then?"
"Sure. I'd love to." She gave a big smile that showed off her dimples, the left one more pronounced. Then, as if their whole conversation had been a planned out script, like clockwork the shuttle pulled up. She reshouldered her backpack and made towards the bus. "Just email me sometime where you want to meet. See you Wednesday!" And before he could reply she had already boarded, the doors closing behind her.
"Wait, Wednesday?"
Oh, right, class. Good thing she didn't hear me. Man, why I am such an idiot?
But he didn't care. Nothing he had said or done, no matter how foolish it seemed, none of it mattered at this point. He did it; he talked to her. If someone had told him three days ago that this would happen, he wouldn't have believed them. He had to tell somebody; he needed to find Jay. He couldn't contain his happiness. He was beaming.
He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he almost didn't notice when someone passed by saying hi to him. He turned around to see Mel staring at him.
"What are you so happy about, huh?" she asked mockingly. He suddenly became very aware of himself.
"Nothing," he said very seriously, quickly dulling his expression. He turned with his nose in the air in a dignified fashion and strode off.
Mel laughed after him, "All right Justin, see you at dinner. Have a great day."
When he knew she couldn't see his face anymore, he burst out smiling.
It already was a great day. "
~j
to be continued...
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